Mr. Abe and the Comfort Women

MOLLY:

What is a comfort woman?  Can I be one?

DOLLOP:

During World War II, the Japanese sent many soldiers into Southeast Asia to take over those countries.  The soldiers were very young and far away from home.  They missed their mothers.  In Japan, their mothers took very very good care of them.  Suddenly the boys were in the jungle: bugs are biting, it is terrifically hot and steamy, there is never time for a bath.  You know, the Japanese really like to take a hot, hot bath every night which is a great comfort.  So, commanders decided that women in new strange Southeastern countries could help their soldiers by providing them with comfort.  They called on people in places they had invaded to round up some good women.  Every woman was given a little room and a very large supply of those hot moist washcloths that you get on the plane to wipe your face and hands – the next best thing to a full bath.  Then they had the soldiers line up to visit the “comfort women.”   

Later the women complained that they were exhausted from so many soldiers.  When they were finally done, in some cases after a few years, or the war was over, they returned to their families.  Their families did not want them back because they were cranky from years of doing that work.   Some of them were so cranky that they would not speak of this “comfort” time in their lives, and they could not have children.  Some live together and have cats and Koi fish.  You know how people make fun of that.

The Japanese later apologized to the women for making them do it.  Many had grown very old, had never stopped being cranky, and really didn’t think the apology made up for it.

Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe recently insisted that the Japanese military really did not have a role in the “recruitment” of the women.  He said that the “comfort system” was really set up by friendly natives in the countries they invaded as a kind welcoming gesture.  Indeed, really, the natives offered up their daughters and future wives.

Mr. Abe is caving on the issue, and will appease the uproar from the few women still left alive, from about 200,000, and who are old ladies bold enough to speak up about this controversial experience, which is really not proper at all if you are in the Orient.  Since he claims the women were volunteers and really just “friendly, welcoming natives,” Mr. Abe offered to make amends.  He will send 200,000 Japanese boy missionaries to volunteer to give comfort to total strangers in the countries the Japanese invaded.   They will bring 4 billion washcloths and the latest Japanese washcloth steaming contraptions, and each boy will handle MORE than 20 strangers in need of comfort, each day.  Even if they get tired, they will give massages and do embarrassing personal touching if their “guests” demand it.  Mr. Abe thinks that this will put to rest the rampant, life-long harbored feelings of victimization and grief for a lost normal life on the part of a few grumpy women.  It will demonstrate that the Japanese know “comfort” when they see it, and they can give it as much as take it.

In fact, to neutralize the myths that have built up about the “comfort system,” Mr. Abe is personally going to demonstrate how giving comfort to dozens of strangers for years is not all that bad.  He is going to open a booth at the Mall of America and welcome all comers, time allowing in his schedule.

Thai and Cambodian business agents have asked Mr. Abe to consider coming to their personal services districts to show them how it’s done.  They inquired whether the boys would be virgins.

You can’t be one because you had to be captured by the Japanese to be one.  They are not currently capturing women right now, and they don’t have a bunch of soldiers far away from home who really want that steaming washcloth.

However, other Asian countries have picked up on the idea of comfort girls and women.  Because they are in so much demand, there are people in the business of “recruiting” girls and transporting them to certain towns, such as places in Cambodia and Thailand.  These girls are made to sell comfort to many men, including many foreign tourists who hire giant buses to bring them to these districts off-the-beaten-path.  The women are set up in certain hotel rooms, with a good supply of steaming hot towels, or, they live in special houses with lots of little private rooms.  If the girls get tired of the work, they try to save up $70-$150 to pay the business owner to “buy out” their share of the business. 

You can’t be one of those because your parents would miss you too much.  But I am sure they will give you $100 to do some other kind of work, too.